Adulthood

Have you ever had the feeling of just giving up? I mean not permanently (goodness, no!), but maybe just for a while.. an adult vacation from.. well.. adulthood.  Example:  I want to lay on the couch, have someone make me food, not go to work or school, and be provided for. haha.. of course, I joke.  I am blessed to be able to do those things on my own being healthy and of sound (sometimes.. haha) mind, and I love them all.  But life does get quite overwhelming at times.

As a child, you have no concept of just how hard life can get.  When you're young, most of us see our parents as these invincible pillars - always strong.  I look at how my parents were with us as children and I would have never known the difficulties they went through until I was much older. I know we're all like that, but it's just amazing how much is sheltered from the mind of a child.  Or rather, maybe it's not so much sheltered as what can actually be processed as a child.  Maybe a bit of both.

As a child, we may be able to worry, but not as much as we do as adults.  Some adults are much better at worrying than others.  I am the worlds best worrier.  Not a bragging right, but a truth nonetheless.  I worry about everything - perhaps because I am somewhat of a perfectionist in performance.  If I do something, you better believe I'm going to do it the best of my ability.  That method isn't always the best method, however.  It usually causes me to procrastinate when my whole heart isn't into it yet.

Also as a child, you don't have the concept of romantic love (although I'm feeling like there are more adults that are still at that level).  Many of us struggle to find someone that loves you in the same manner, can carry the same work ethics, share the same beliefs, hold the same priorities.  At 33, I have yet to find this.  Maybe I'm being a bit picky.  Maybe I'm waiting for something.  As I said in another one of my blogs, I always feel like I'm waiting - and I never feel at home anywhere.  I even said this to my mom one day.  I don't, though. I never feel at  home. In the past 5 years, I've lived in 4 different places. Seriously... who does that? I keep searching for something and I have yet to find it.

So like I said... being an adult is rough - and we'd like to throw in the towel for a few days.  Maybe what I really needs is a summer vacation home with a pool boy!  KIDDING!

At any rate, I certainly am thankful to be able to have adult problems, though. I've had a few friends who've had their lives cut short, and I wouldn't take my blessings in life for granted.  But the struggle is real some days. I am thankful for a few true friends I've made in this life that make venting a little easier, and a God that allows me to count my blessings a lot more.  Family is up there too. 

Well, make today another good day in life.  Enjoy being an adult, and the the responsibilities therein.  While I'd love to take a short-term leave from adulthood from time to time, I'll gladly keep up the good fight.  Besides, if I hit the lottery someday, I plan on taking that temporary adult "layoff" along side a beautiful sandy beach.  Maybe you'd like to go with?

Happy Thursday!